The only reason for time is so that everything doesn't happen at once

October is a funny month. I wonder what happened to September and find myself at the end of October terrified that another year is passing and I cannot recall exactly where the time went. I suppose saying something like "where did the time go" is somewhat redundant in the general sense because it's not going anywhere it hasn't been before. I can't help but feel this overwhelming sense of running out of time. Not my life, or my possibility, but just time wasted and experiences lost in the midst of it. I keep telling myself I'll be more productive and use my time wisely and "starting tomorrow" bla bla bla. 

I guess I will start tomorrow. I have no other option, really. 

I have also decided to stop drinking and smoking. I can't handle it anymore. I was thinking about it and realized that I had drank every day for the last... while. I have been waking up sickly and not being able to leave my bed for the majority of the day, that is, until I go out again. I feel like I have only seen this city at night for the last couple of months and by city i mean the likeness of a bar or bottle. 

I guess in a sense time is running out. It's starting to get cold in New York and any day I could spend enjoying Fall I am sitting in my room. 

This too will change starting tomorrow. 

Maybe Sundays are lonely. 

It's Monday in ten minutes.